Axver (axver) wrote,
Axver
axver

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Vast sweeping generalisations for humorous effect

So, the following was just swirling through my head while I was trying - and failing - to come up with a good introduction to my Honours thesis. Why think of a good opening sentence when I can have some lulz about university instead?

Hierarchy amongst faculties

Based on observations of multiple Australian universities, from the top of the hierarchy to the very bottom.

1. Law: snobs, rich.
2. Medicine: not snobs, rich.
3. Science: snobs, not rich.
4. Arts: not snobs, not rich (too busy getting or recovering from hangovers).
5. Education: not snobs, not rich, not taken seriously.
6. Literary criticism: wankers.

Well, #6 isn't a faculty, but even Arts disowns it and lets it fall at the bottom of the heap.

Hierarchy within Arts

Too lazy to make this properly exhaustive.

1. History: self-important, actually do work.
2. Linguistics: not self-important, actually do work.
3. Political science: self-important, don't do much work.
4. Philosophy: self-important, don't do any work.
5. Theology: not self-important (when they remember to practise humility), don't have any work, often considered extinct.
6. Literary criticism: wankers.
Tags: university
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