Axver (axver) wrote,

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The worst Christmas cards ever

Alas, it is the 13th of December. Twelve days until Christmas. This is the day I traditionally put up the Christmas tree and can no longer bitch about how "it's not Christmas yet!" I am the voice of Christmas pessimism.

One thing I have always been dreadful at are Christmas cards. Either I struggle and strain to think of something that sounds sincere and write the first mundane thing that comes to mind and drop the card in the mail with a thought of "thank god that's done", or even worse, I'm too stingy to buy actual cards and try making something myself, only to be reminded I have utterly no artistic talents.

But this year, I have decided to embrace my shit Christmas cards! No more shall I struggle for non-shit sincerity. This time, I have decided to send people the worst Christmas card they have ever received. The best part? I'll put effort into this, so you can rest assured you will be getting the most genuinely sincere cards I have ever sent.

So, if you want the WORST CHRISTMAS CARD YOU HAVE EVER RECEIVED, please leave me your name and address - either in the comments (which are screened so that nobody can see it other than me) or by e-mailing me at amakaxver[at] or by PMing me on Interference.

Disclaimer: I do not promise you that you will receive a card. I'm on a budget, so depending on how many people reply, I simply may not be able to afford to send cards all over the globe. If you don't get a card, it doesn't mean I like you any less; I will do cards in the order I think of terrible ideas, so maybe you should feel complimented if you don't get a card because I couldn't immediately think of something dreadful for you.

And no, I don't expect anything in return. Don't feel like you need to send me something. Depending on where you live, it may not get to me before I head up to Queensland anyway.
Tags: christmas

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