The e-mail: "Copy and paste this and change the answers to suit yourself, and then send it off to all of your friends.
1. Full name: Andrzj Niznij Uncinskij Rybodcastok Azerbaijan Bretowskij
2. Age: I lost track at 3,172
3. D.O.B: A loooong time ago. Not long after Noah.
4. Hair colour: What colour hair do you think my hair would be at this age?
5. Eye colour: It still has that sparkle in the blue.
6. What are you listening to right now? Silence. Yes, in my many thousands of years, I have learnt it is possible to hear silence.
7. When was the last time you spoke on the phone? In about 4 BC. I had to call someone to tell them their Saviour had been born.
8. What time did you wake up today? I need no sleep. I did all I needed many moons ago. I do take rests for fun, though.
9. Do you have a secret crush on anyone? Yes, I am secretly about to crush you.
10. Do you know what you will be doing in the next hour? Of course. I know what you'll be doing, too. Bwahaha!
11. Do you prefer summer or winter? Any season that happens to involve YTF.
12. What is your fav colour? One you've never seen before.
13. Do you prefer night or day? Whichever has YTF.
14. What is the time right now? I can't be that precise. By the time I check my watch and type it in, it will be at least one second later, and, even if I modify it, it will not be the time right now when I send this, or when you get this.
15. Are you single or attachted? I am singular. I am not plural. I am the ONLY Andrzj Niznij Uncinskij Rybodcastok Azerbaijan Bretowskij. And I most certainly hope I am not attached to anything. That may be painful. Can you imagine how much it would hurt to be attached to your computer desk all day?
16. Have you ever been drunk? It's one thing I haven't tried in my thousands of years, and don't plan on trying.
17. Do you smoke? See 16.
18. Are your parents together? No. They are not together, but separate entities that exist by themselves.
19. How would you describe yourself? Me.
20. Have you had an arguement in the last 24 hours? I do a lot of things.
21. Have you cried in the last 24 hours? I said I do a lot of things.
22. Do you have something that you want to say to someone, but dont have the courage to say it to their face? Hmmm ... I'll get back to you on that. If I have the courage to. I may say it to your back, though.
23. Do you try and get along with everyone? The 'and' should be a 'to'.
24. Do you make an effort when it comes to school work? At my age, do you seriously think I'd be going to school. A 'no' answer would be incorrect. I've gone back for fun, but, yes, I try. It's a past-time of mine.
25. Do you accept compliments? And why wouldn't I?
26. If someone picked a fight with you, would you go through with it? If they're wrong, I'll tell them as much.
27. If you have a piece of paper and a pen, do you instantly start drawing? No, I start plotting to take over the world, or at least your life.
28. Does music motivate you to do things? Lots of things motivate me.
29. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping? Now that you mention it ...
30. Do you have a fav stuffed toy? Oh yes. They are necessary for survival if you live past 2000 years.
31. Have you ever broken/fractured/sprained any bones? Yes. You get that.
32. Is your hair colour natural? No. I dye it this colour because I like it. Seriously, what do you think?
33. If it is, would you like to change it? Depends on what mood I'm in and what I'm doing. World domination speeches usually require jet black hair.
34. If it isn't, what is your natural colour, and how many times have you coloured it before? I'm ignoring this question on the basis of question 33.
35. Do you have any pierceings? That's one thing I never thought of doing.
36. If you could change your name, what would you change it to? Andre Brett. It's easier than Andrzj Niznij Ucinskij Rybodcastok Azerbaijan Bretowskij. And, YES, Azerbaijan WAS named after me, not me after it.
37. What do you have on your bedroom walls? Things.
38. What colour are you bedroom walls? A colour.
39. What colour would you like them to be? Something, as long as it's a colour.
40. What is your fav article of clothing? My All Blacks jacket.
41. If you had to part with something that you owned, what would it be? Nothing. I hated having to part with YTF. That was painful.
42. If there was one person in the world that you could have, who would it be? Why do you think I'm stalking you?
43. What is your all time fav song? 'Gloria (Under A Blood Red Sky CD version)' by U2.
44. Do you know how to program your VCR? I have slaves to do that for me.
45. What is on the top of your "To do list"? Get YTF back.
46. How many contacts on your MSN list, do you actually KNOW? Why would I have a contact that I don't even know? It's so blasted illogical. "Hmm ... I'm just randomly going to type in a contact and it may work. It'll be someone I've never even heard of before! Go me!"
47. If you could do one thing to change the world, what would it be? Take it over.
48. How many kids do you hope to have and what are their names? I've had a lot already. I forget their names.
49. What is your fav saying? "Goodbye YTF. Lest we forget", "Shut up", and "You shall bow to me"
50. Do you have anything you want to say to the people that you are sending this to? I hope you can tell the sarcasm. I really do. If you can't ... the resulting impression you may get of me could be quite humorous indeed!"