Axver (axver) wrote,

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Observations about Australia, motivation, and high school.

Way To Know You Live In Australia #1583
The existence of entirely worthless, pointless holidays and the fact no-one dares to even think of cancelling them.

The Gold Coast Show (like a fair or a carnival) is on this week, and tomorrow is Gold Coast Show Day. Yes, we have a public holiday because of it. It's meant to allow people to go to the show, but in reality, most people stay home and sleep in. I don't know a single person who plans on going, and I'd never go near it. Even if U2 were playing there, I'd have to do some serious soul-searching with regards to my attendance. Can you tell I really despise these sorts of things?

Way To Know You Lack Motivation #835
You have to talk yourself into standing up to get something you actually want ... and then stay seated for over half an hour before actually getting it.

What did I want to get? My school book, for during lunchtime today, I wrote some observations that shall now be transcribed here.

I spent today observing, and I would have to note that I find high school society to be intriguing. In a hateful way, yes, but nonetheless intriguing. It has a morbid curiousity about it, rather akin to a road accident, and while I desire to leave, some inexplicable feeling at least vaguely keeps me prompted to feel some sorrow at this impending departure. A lot of this would be derived from my own particular circumstances and the fact I linger on the fringe - whether or not this is my fault, I am unsure. I am meant to be a part of this group, and so I feel I should at least know these people; the remorse probably comes from the fact that while I associate with them, I don't know them, despite any nice image they present to me. I hear pieces about individuals here and there, some of it positive and some negative, but all in all, I am totally left out, and this weird desire keeps me wishing my existence would be acknowledged in a more pleasant and less forced manner. You can't really tell people that though, because then things become even more forced, and such a feeling, vague and unwanted though it may be, acts in stark rebellion to my cynicism and ability to believe the worst about people. The morbid curiousity of high school is that this cynicism is proven true with disturbing frequence, and a part of me reacts to it like it's a car crash. It is, after all, horrific and brutal, an offense to the senses, and intolerable in its wanton rebellion against the ideals of peace and calm. I guess the slick lawyers that gather around accident sites are represented in high school society by the sleaziness and sordidity that I despise. The saddest fact is that I go to a private school that is probably pretty tame. I'd most likely be dead from shock if I went to a public or more notorious private school in the area, or at least, I suspect, be less intelligent.

So that was pretty random, but I feel it's pretty true, even if explained poorly. I cannot stand high school and leaving will be a true breath of fresh air, but it still has that intrigue and morbid curiousity about it. Sad fact is, the intrigue is not about anything worthwhile, and the negatives of morbid curiousity are pretty clear. I have come to the opinion that high school society, and probably teenage (if not Western) society in general is a total waste, a frivolous excuse for human interaction based on foundations that can be best described as shaky. Consumerist culture is probably most to blame; it preys upon the inherent immaturity of preteens and would be unable to survive if the core teenage market suddenly became mature and had taste. Today's popular music scene is evidence of that. It's just one mindnumbingly pathetic act after another - the Spice Girls, N'Sync, Britney Spears, Idol, what next? I'm too afraid to think about that. In any case, you could come up with a good few examples of what I'm talking about, and in essence, my point is that teenage society is not encouraged to be mature, intelligent, or thoughtful, despite what any propaganda may say. People are only concerned with themselves and worry about trivial issues of no substance. Sometimes I think I have a lack of knowledge, but then I look around at my peers and I feel extremely comforted, and often I feel I do nothing for the world, but looking at a lot of people I know can be a remarkable ego boost.

Anyway. Many things are circulating in my head right now, just waiting to be jotted down on paper or LiveJournal. I'm looking forward to an opportunity to gather my thoughts, if not during the next holidays then definitely after the school year is over. I think that I will learn more over the upcoming summer than I will have learnt in the last few years. The education system is in desperate need of an overhaul in my opinion.
Tags: high school, society
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