That said, it doesn't really matter how daunting this all is, because I absolutely cannot wait for next year. I am desperately, desperately hoping that there's an intellectual crowd, somewhere for me to fit in. What I am most certain of is that I do not fit in at high school, especially not when people are standing around and talking. Besides the fact I'm a bit on the shy side (though some would never know it), the simple reality is that I am not interested in popular teenage culture. Rarely am I concerned with the latest television series, only occasionally do I ever consider the latest music to be of a good quality, and frankly, the quickest way to bore me to tears is to talk about whatever horrifically violent computer game has become popular. Call me weird, but I want to have serious discussions, ramble about U2, and contemplate matters of the world and life in an intelligent manner. I guess that explains my interest in issues of human rights and widespread inequality. It is a fact that the richest billion people in the world are ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY TIMES RICHER than the world's poorest billion. And what do we do for our world? Do we reduce consumption to avoid raping foreign countries of resources? Do we donate our excess to the less fortunate? Do we travel by public transport so that we cut down on pollution? Do we even care?
This reminds me ...
Again, I would like to encourage you to read and distribute this entry and consider keeping up with this crisis via darfur_crisis. I do not see how you could possibly skip over that entry and not feel a thing. How sad it must be to be so apathetic that you will stand by and remain in the majority that do NOTHING and DON'T EVEN CARE. I feel nothing but sorrow for you.
The reports from the formal basically confirmed what I already knew - in my eyes, it was a pointless event, but in the eyes of most, it was a fantastic evening and I'm supposedly a bit of a twit for thinking the way I do. However, what I heard about the after-party both confirmed and failed to satisfy my cynicism. That said, it seems teenagers will be teenagers in every sense of the stereotyped word. Drunkenness never did appeal to me, though. I like to keep myself in strict control of my senses.
Anyway, during SOR today, I was doing some work on my assignment when I made an interesting realisation. I'm comparing Allah (Islam) to Yahweh (Judaism), and so I was flicking through a book on Judaism, taking notes and such, when I noticed something worded close to this;
Unlike Christianity, belief is not important in Judaism. What is important is to understand and know that God simply is. There is no personal acceptance or realisation.
Remarkably, I am currently experiencing a similar thing, simply under a Christian framework. When I say I'm not feeling all that strong in my faith, people instantly assume I'm doubting God's reality and that I'm about to spew forth with a series of questions along the lines of "Did Jesus REALLY do this, that, and the other?" If ever there was an erroneous assumption to make, that is it. I understand and know that God is. There is an unshakeable knowledge and understanding in my mind that there is a higher power, and he has revealed himself through the series of writings we know as the Bible. I am completely assured that Jesus Christ was the Messiah spoken of by the prophets of old, and that he did exactly what he is said to have done. Intellectually, I have a firm grasp of Christianity and I am more than happy to engage in a theological debate.
What I mean when I speak of feeling weak in my faith is that it is not real beyond any intellectual or 'simply is' sense. The belief component, and therefore the life, is somewhat lacking. It is not totally lacking, but I do not feel inspired in my faith and something is missing in my relationship with God. Accepting something intellectually and applying something in everyday life in the most practical sense are two thoroughly different things, and while the first is important, it is stale and stagnant without the second. And out of the blue, I feel inspired to quote Bono: "the goal is soul."
On a related note, you know you are bored when you begin inventing really bad Christian cliches for your own amusement. Not long after I was sitting in the car laughing to myself at the silliness and triviality of these cliches ('Win, don't sin!'), I found myself in the glasses shop, requesting they look into my reading glasses, no pun intended. It turns out they made them significantly too strong and they have to remake it. Sigh. So I guess that's another 2-3 weeks to wait.
Confuse your geography class! Say the following: "After Russia and China threatened to veto the resolution due to the wording, the USA removed the word 'sanctions' from the draft submission and it passed 13-0. That means there were two abstentions - China and Pakistan. And why did Pakistan abstain? Well, guess where Pervez Musharraf is! He's meeting with the regime in Khartoum!" I got a series of blank looks and one "You totally lost me." I think 'Pervez Musharraf' did it.
And this is where I will call it an evening. Tonight, I have made a vow to do work. Have a good one!