We have hereby determined the following forms of death, all U2-related.
Eminem, 50 Cent, Outkast, Snoop Dogg, Outkast, and other assorted rappers - crushed by the Elevation heart
Hillary Duff - run over by a Trabant
Britney Spears - hung off a joshua tree with a mulletrope wire
Justin Timberlake - beaten up by the boy
Avril Lavigne - set on fire to light up the night
Jennifer Lopez - skewered by the Popmart olive
All boybands - crushed by the Popmart screen
All those manufactured poprock/punk bands - flattened by a rolling Popmart lemon
Paris Hilton - pushed off scaffolding by Bono
Christina Aguilera - killed by a bombardment of ZooTVisms
The Olsen twins - die of starvation after becoming lost in a forest of shadows and tall trees
Michael Jackson - buried with Zoo dollars
Janet Jackson - glued to the Elevation screens a-la The Fly and simply left there
Sounds good, doesn't it?
Yesterday, I downloaded some non-U2 bootlegs. Yes, you better believe it. One's a Pink Floyd bootleg from 1969, and this has to be one of the weirdest things I have ever heard. The Crowded House and Dire Straits bootlegs are pretty bloody cool, though. Awesome live version of Sultans Of Swing and two unreleased tracks - frankly, I can see why one was unreleased! The music's fine, though not the best, but the lyrics are plain awful and uncreative.
Now, here's a funny one for you. Yesterday, I got very stressed and frustrated, I snapped quite violently at one of my friends when they tried to prove the US government was humanitarian, I started yelling at my computer screen, and I was otherwise about to lose the plot. Initially, I was just going to go to bed and let that be that, but instead, I did something quite different. So what did I do?
1. I put on a U2 DVD (4 November 1981, Berlin) and cranked up The Cry/The Electric Co. while violently drinking a bottle of water.
2. I cooked dinner while watching aforementioned DVD.
3. I ate dinner while watching aforementioned DVD.
And then ...
4. I CLEANED MY ROOM! It was CATHARTIC. I vented frustration by putting Time magazines in order, cleaning up all the rubbish on my pool table, getting rid of the junk on my computer desk, and otherwise making things tidy. I did it all quite furiously and vented a lot of built up stress and tension inside me. It was the WEIRDEST THING EVER.
So there you have it, everyone. Looking for stress relief? CLEAN YOUR BLOODY ROOM. Works for me! Ha, I still can't believe it.
There are also five sheets of paper in my room that I treasure. That is all for today.