March 21st, 2007

Beach ball

Axver's adventures in the real world: Weird people on trams.

I swear, I see the funniest people on the trams here in Melbourne. Not disturbing and disruptive ones like November's weird bongo dude, but amusing people who perhaps should reconsider what they do in public.

A couple of weeks ago, I found myself sitting next to this old Asian guy. He seemed perfectly normal for about half of the trip, and then he just suddenly started talking to himself. He'd talk for a minute, then go quiet for a while, talk some more, and so on. At first I thought he was talking on a hands-free phone, but unless microphones and headphones are invisible nowadays, he was not. The strangest part was that it sounded as if he were speaking some sort of tribal language from sub-Saharan Africa rather than an Asian language.

Then, only a few days later, I was riding to university and found myself sitting opposite this lady who, at first glance, seemed to just be one of those pleasant old ladies who smiles at everyone. And then she just started humming what sounded like an out-of-tune combination of the Australian and American national anthems and the wedding march.

But I think the teenage guy from a couple of days ago topped the lot. His appearance was that of some tough Asian gang member. He looked like he'd bash the crap out of anyone who looked sideways at him. So I was sitting opposite him, reading a book for university because I'd been lazy and hadn't read it the night before, when I heard what sounded like a little girl singing. I hadn't seen any children on the tram, so I looked up, and that was when I realised it was the Asian guy. And he just kept singing along to his iPod in this high pitched girly voice. Two stops down the line, he got up and departed the tram, still doing his best impression of a little girl. It was strange.

I love the trams. Who needs TV for entertainment?