October 23rd, 2004


(no subject)

I don't really feel like updating today, which may come as a surprise to some of you, but what's the point? I'm aggravated at a gigantic and vast chunk of the world right now. I could rant and rant about it, but does anything change? Is there ever any progress? And the most relevant question for me is do I even do anything to help cause the change I so fervently demand? People don't care. It doesn't take a genius to tell you that. Just look around. To put it crassly, does anyone give a shit? Everyone hides in the bubbles they blow up around themselves, even you and me.

I theorise a lot, but what does it do? You can only point out the flaws in the world so much before you start to become acutely aware of your own flaw of inaction. And there's no use dreaming about a perfect world, because no-one can make that happen, especially not when no-one else even has the energy to care. Why strive to make a difference? A couple of people might sit up and take notice, but in the grand scheme of things, so what?

Though even worse is the reality of ranting about this. It's a twisted form of hypocrisy. In my ABP speech, I say that society encourages people to dismiss crucial issues as too difficult to solve, and what am I doing here? Dismissing THAT issue as too difficult to solve and contemplating retreating further into my cynical and negative existence well away from the intellectual dearth of Western society. How will that help anyone? Well, maybe my brain will throb a little less. Maybe I won't have anyone to fail my expectations but myself. That doesn't negate the total uselessness of such an endeavour.

If you do something, nobody cares and nothing happens. If you don't do something, you're just the same as the people you rant about. I've lost my faith in myself and humanity.

This is my request to you to restore it. If that's possible.

Maybe I will listen to my icon.
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    'Bad (U2 cover, uncertain date)' by Dream Theater