Tomorrow I'll be coming straight home after the exam, which I have first up. The ... illness, I suppose you could call it, is getting a bit better but after discussing things with the Director of Student Welfare, we decided it'd be best if I had some days off. I would've had today and tomorrow off if it wasn't for the exams. I can't believe we've got exams this early. It's so unnatural and whenever I say to anyone I have an exam to instantly replies with something like "What, now? You've only been back at school a few weeks!" I personally feel we should've had a little more time to practice, but oh well.
I hate the school system. During year level assembly this morning, the Director of Studies got up and gave a quick talk that I think, rather than boosting our grades, is going to cause those of all but a select few to slip. Instead of emphasising the idea of working together, aiding each other, and helping everyone to get the best mark possible - as Johnno has emphasised in SOR in the past as being a very effective method of achieving the highest - he emphasised the fact that the schooling system is all about competition, we're all competing against each other, and we're to strive to get ahead of as many people as possible. So that's going to result in people hogging resources, being selfish, and simply foster an attitude against working together as a team. It's just stupid and I know it will lead to pettiness. If everyone were encouraged to work as a team and share information and resources and provide help, everyone would get boosted by each other and really get somewhere ... what good does encouraging us to compete against each other as if it's the survival of the fittest, death of the weakest going to do? The speech was all full of fear. "If you do not get a good OP, you're going to have to go to a university." "Last year's results were disappointing and your current attitude is sending you right in that direction." Blah blah blah. Shut up.
This is what I call sad.
One Tree Hill
We turn away to face the cold, enduring chill
As the day begs the night for mercy love
The sun’s so bright it leaves no shadows, only scars
Carved into stone on the face of earth
The moon is up and over One Tree Hill
We see the sun go down in your eyes
You run like a river, oh like the sea
You run like a river runs to sea
And in the world a heart of darkness
A fire zone
Where poets speak their heart
Then bleed for it
Jara sang, his song a weapon
In the hands of love
You know his blood still cries from the ground
It runs like a river runs to the sea
It runs like a river to the sea
I don’t believe in painted roses or bleeding hearts
While bullets rape the night of the merciful
I’ll see you again when the stars fall from the sky
And the moon has turned red
Over One Tree Hill
We run like a river run to the sea
We run like a river to the sea
And when it’s raining
That’s when the rain will break my heart
Raining, raining in the heart
Raining in your heart
Raining, raining to your heart
Raining to your heart
In your heart
To the sea
Oh great ocean
Oh great sea
Run to the ocean
Run to the sea
Personally, I feel that would've been awesome followed by MLK. Scrub the "Oh great ocean ... run to the sea" verse - I think it doesn't really belong and the song would be better off without it - and replace it with the first verse of MLK, then launch into the intro of Streets during the second, a la Super Bowl 2002. That would be awesomeness, and the definition of moving. The crowd would go ballistic.
I need live Hawkmoon 269.
The prospect of most likely having to stay at Sam's for a week at the start of next month is uncomfortable and I dislike it. If I could frigging drive or lived near someone who could take me to school, this wouldn't be a problem. Grr. I could go on a rant but I'm not in the mood to.
--- 10:46pm ---
Oh my. I receive so many amazing blessings ... what did I do to deserve them? It's just ... wow. Where does God get off with giving someone like me so much? I feel so touched, almost like I could cry (I don't suppose listening to haunting performances of With Or Without You and Love Is Blindness really helps). I feel so loved. I have the best friends in the world, you all are incredible. Thank you.