Axver (axver) wrote,

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Boredom, remarkably enough, is boring.

Soren Kierkegaard had a point when he said everything is boring.

"I do not care for anything. I do not care to ride, for the exercise is too violent. I do not care to walk, walking is too strenuous. I do not are to lie down, for I should either have to remain lying, and I do not care to do that, or I should have to get up again, and I do not care to do that either. Summa summarum: I do not care at all."

"I have just come from a party of which I was the souk; witticism flowed from my mouth, all laughed and admired me, but I went away - and there should be a dash as long as the radius of the earth's orbit - and wanted to shoot myself."

I'm not feeling that extreme, but I sure know what he was getting at.

--- 5:17 --- (In an ironic twist of fate, I post some stuff that is amusing rather than boring)

You all should find this quite amusing, especially if you're familiar with Star Wars posters and video covers. I find it amusing how John Howard is compared to Yoda. The really amusing part is that it actually SUITS him. But really, come on. America has a normal looking national leader, so do Britain, France, Russia; even bloody Saddam Hussein looked normal enough, and yet here in Australia, we have a national leader who looks like the offspring of Yoda and a chimpanzee. The competition's not much better ... indeed, they're worse. Howard's last opponent at a national election was a herd of cattle, packed into a roughly humanoid shape and then hit by a bus (Kim Beazley), and then the opposition leader was Simon Crean, the most boring man on earth. I think his children spend most of their time sleeping. All they need to do is wake up and look at their father to fall back to sleep from the sheer BOREDOM. And now Crean's resigned the leadership because he's so boring that he can't even challenge Howard, so I need a photo of the new guy, Mark Latham, to make fun of. If I remember right, he reminded me of an annoying little runt that you just want to kick. He's definitely got the personality of one: he called Howard an "arse licker" and said America is dangerous (the latter is very open to debate depending upon your worldview, the former is a bare-faced lie). The Australian Labor Party sucks, and not just because they can't spell 'labour'. I'm so glad Howard's PM, otherwise this nation really would've gone down the drain. The only way Howard could lose the next election is if he was killed, and maybe not even then. Labour (I refuse to bow to their spelling) is so flaming useless that a chipmunk from Venus could do a better job of running the country.

Oh, that reminds me! It's like punk rock made on Venus ...

And now to kill your eyes.

Mmm ... ZooTVisms at high speed ...

Not to be left out, here's something I typed up not long ago after some people said some things to me. I decided against posting it, but I just read over it and thought a few of the points were too humorous NOT to post. Particularly the Tasmania comment (#18). Eh ... maybe it's just my warped sense of humour.

I've been asked some shocking questions lately in relation to my part of the world. Hence the following reference sheet;

1. This may come as a shock, but paved roads, footpaths, multi-lane highways, and modern cars are commonplace in Australia. We have a well-built, well-established road system.
2. If you couldn't tell from my LiveJournal and the Sydney 2000 Olympics, we speak English. Indeed, I would argue that your average Australian teenager has a better grasp of the lingo than your average American teenager. And at least we haven't butchered it with poor spelling.
3. We do not ride kangaroos.
4. The Crocodile Hunter and Crocodile Dundee are NOT fair representations or illustrations of Australia or its people.
5. There are VERY few people who keep koalas, kangaroos, and other native Australian animals as pets. Kangaroos and koalas do not freely roam the streets - I live in a rural suburb, hence the kangaroo on my property - though they may be found with ease if you know where to look.
6. We have large cities. Sydney has a population of 3,500,000, Melbourne 3,00,000, Brisbane, Perth, and Adelaide over 1,000,000, and the greater Gold Coast is over 700,000. The significant majority of our population is urban.
7. You should not be surprised when we express shock that you do not know where our states and major cities are located. We know where yours are; as America's second-closest ally, medium-level world power, and dominant Western country in the region, it is only fair that you have some basic knowledge of our geography.
8. The national sport is cricket. Some may argue the point, but cricket is the only sport that is extremely popular nationwide. New South Wales (and to a lesser extent Queensland) is rugby league territory, Victoria = Aussie Rules and due to the success of the Brisbane Lions, it is gaining significant popularity in Queensland, rugby union is played nationwide though not on the level of cricket, car racing is highly popular and we actually have imaginative tracks, and soccer is a popular sport. Golf and tennis are also played, though more as a leisure activity.
9. We know about foreign sports that are not played or not overly popular here (i.e. American football, baseball, basketball, sumo wrestling), so it is not seen as unreasonable to expect foreigners to know about ours. And really, if you don't know what rugby union and cricket are, you're very left out from the world because they happen to be more popular and widely played than American football, baseball, and arguably basketball.
10. We actually live in normal houses. We are not impoverished third world squatters; this is a bastion of Western civilisation and one of the most advanced countries on earth.
11. The entire nation is not the Outback. The Outback is called that for a reason.
12. Uluru (aka Ayer's Rock, aka that massive rock thing in the Outback) is NOT in my back yard.
13. Our Prime Minister is John Howard and cartoons compare him to Yoda.
14. We are very up-with-the-play on world affairs. It is arguable that your average Australian teenager knows more about the world around him or her than your average American teenager.
15. You do not have to speak down to us or use simple language. This nation has produced some very intelligent people.
16. We are an independent state. We are not ruled or owned by Britain, America, Switzerland, or whatever other nation you care to name.
17. New Zealand is an independent state. It is NOT part of Australia.
18. Tasmania exists. Do not be fooled.
19. We have a military, and a very skilled one at that. Again, do not be fooled.
20. We - Australia and New Zealand - have produced many talented musical acts. The fact they are largely unknown beyond these two nations should be a source of shame for the world music industry.
21. Not all your slang is in use here, no matter how much you may want to export it.
22. We have our own culture. We do not need yours forced upon us.
23. We have our own government and business. We do not need yours to try to tell us what to do; we are capable of independent thought and sometimes, we will not choose the same tactic as you.
24. Buildings taller than one storey, two storeys, ten storeys, and even thirty storeys do exist in this nation and are structurally sound. The largest residential tower and tallest building in the Southern Hemisphere is currently being built on the Gold Coast - named Q1, it is an 80 storey apartment block.
25. I should never have needed to type this out. It is a sad commentary that people have raised enough silly questions to prompt this.

Four Seasons In One Day
Written by Neil and Tim Finn, performed by Crowded House

Four seasons in one day
Lying in the depths of your imagination
Worlds above and worlds below
The sun shines on the black clouds hanging over the domain
Even when you're feeling warm
The temperature could drop away
Like four seasons in one day

Smiling as the shit comes down
You can tell a man from what he has to say
Everything gets turned around
And I will risk my neck again ... again
You can take me where you will
Up the creek and through the mill
Like all the things you can't explain
Four seasons in one day

Blood dries up
Like rain
Like rain
Fills my cup
Like four seasons in one day

It doesn't pay to make predictions
Sleeping on an unmade bed
Finding out wherever there is comfort, there is pain
Only one step away
Like four seasons in one day

Blood dries up
Like rain
Like rain
Fills my cup
Like four seasons in one day

--- 7:01 ---

I just sat there scrolling through 216 U2 photos. I am mad. Not just because I did that, but because the number 216 is haunting me. GO AWAY. Jerry Jenkins and Tim LaHaye are eeeeevil. They're God, too, or at least LaHaye is and Jenkins is his mouthpiece. Every knee shall bend and confess the name LAHAYE! or be LEFT BEHIND! (TM) (R) (C)! Believe all that these men speak or be bashed by NICOLAE CARPATHIA! Tremble, tremble, oh mortal human, tremble and fall to your knees! Believe all that they say, beLIEve!

Sob, this makes me miss YTF.

Some of the U2 pictures are classic, like Adam Clayton and his crazy afro, Edge with his guitar when he was 17, this VERY early shot of U2 performing and Bono looks so DIFFERENT, and more of Adam's afro. Whee, I want Adam's afro. I've pretty much got the right colour hair, or at least a little lighter. Mum got a ruler out earlier and it's two inches high and sticks up straight quite nicely. It must grow longer.

We're talking about getting some black hair dye (I'm open to a foresty green), and there are these pills on the market that supposedly give you a tan, and I'm getting new glasses soon, so I can't wait for the new school year - walk into school with new glasses, black hair (I'd have to get rid of the green seeing we're only allowed natural colours), and a 'tan'. No-one would recognise me, and it would be BRILLIANT. Oh, so much fun! I MUST do it!

I hate writing Christmas cards, mainly because I'm hopeless at them and because decent cards are REALLY hard to come by. Hence, I shall only be doing ONE this year, and unfortunately for all of you reading this thinking "Ooo, can that one be me?" (alright, so that's not a lot of you), you're too late. Waaay too late.

I've realised I say 'so' too much.

--- 9:05 ---

GRR. My mother's Hotmail account has been deactivated. Not checked in 30 days. DO NOT BLAME THIS ON ME. STOP IT. It is not MY responsibility to check YOUR account. Just because I'm on the computer a lot doesn't mean that it is my fault! You should remind me! Don't say I should do it out of habit because I SHOULDN'T. They are NOT my e-mails, it has NOTHING to do with me, it is NOT my business, I have NO reason to do it, you should at least bloody remind me. It is NOT that hard. It's not like you get anything anyway. But making me feel bad ... grr, parents. To think I'll be one someday ... ha, woe.
Tags: australia, geography, kierkegaard
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