Axver (axver) wrote,
Axver
axver

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Sarcastic survey, insanely good Internet deal

-General-

1) Single Or Taken: No-one's taken me yet. I feel very un-kidnapped. But I'm not single, either. I am made up of multiple limbs.
2) Your Age: 35683
3) Birthday: January the 40th, 1732.
4) Sign: Blue Donkey.
5) Siblings: None that I know of, twenty-six I don't know of.
6) Hair Color: Flourescent yellow. Like the lights.
7) Shoe Size: .3
8) Full Name: Andrzj Zinzan Niznij Ucinskij Rybodcastok Azerbaijan Zrachnekovskij.

-Relationships-

1) Who are your best friends: My best friend I bought yesterday for $5.62 at an op shop. I'll trade him to you for a chocolate bar and three sheets of tissue paper.
2) Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend: The best friend I purchased is of neutral gender.
3) Did you send this to your crush: I am going to send it to a person I shall crush in the very near future.
4) Did your crush send this to you: No. If someone is crushed, they are rather incapable of using the Internet.

-Fashion Stuff-

1) Where is your favorite place to shop: At shops that stock NOTHING AT ALL.
2) Any tattoos or piercings: Two piercings in my knee, a tattoo on the air three centimetres behind my back.

-The Extra Stuff-

1) Do you do drugs: The Internet and U2 are my drugs.
2) What kind of shampoo do you use: Poo that is a sham. Old joke, I know.
3) What are you most scared of: This question. It inspires great and all-encompassing pH34r.
4) What are you listening to right now: Pink Floyd.
5) What car do you wish to have: A dragster that could mow this question down.
6) Who is the last person that called you: Three frogs in Liberia.
7) Where do you want to get married: In Antarctica, with a penguin as the best man and a polar bear shipped in to do the catering.
8) How many messenger buddies do you have on-line right now: I'm offline, even though I'm connected to the Internet.

Favorites

1) Color: Yellow blue.
2) Food: Inedible substances.
3) Boy's names: Asjgnb.
4) Girls names: Svagdstgne.
5) Subjects in school: U2 fanaticism.
6) Animals: Are edible. Edible substances are disgusting.
7) Sports: Chasing antelopes through Madagascar in gas cars.

-Have You Ever-

1) Given anyone a bath: Nope. Not even myself.
2) Smoked: No, but I have steamed.
3) Bungee jumped: From the ground floor.
4) Broken the law: Yes. I am in jail right now for eating spaghetti.
5) Made yourself throw-up: I have no memory of fifteen years ago, but all reports indicate I did not MAKE myself throw up.
6) Gone skinny-dipping: How does one dip skinny? How is skinny a noun?
7) Ever been in love: With pizza.
8) Made yourself cry to get out of trouble: Haha, this is going to be one of the few questions I've responded to seriously. Yes, to get out of a lunchtime detention in grade eight. Got another guy out of it, too, but instead of thanking me afterwards, he called me a wimp. Ungrateful bastard.

-Final Questions-

1) Do you like filling these out: I like stuffing them with chicken stuffing.
2) How many people are you sending this to: -3.
3) Who will send it back: Twenty of them.
4) Gold or Silver: Bronze.
5) What is the last film you saw at the cinema: The Great Escape. Even though I wasn't born when that came out.

I just found an incredible Internet deal compared to what else is on offer. ADSL broadband, unlimited downloads/uploads, (I'm assuming) unlimited time, 512 kilobytes per second (download), and 128 kilobytes per second (upload), all for the price of AUS$119 (about US$75-80 at the current rate)! What do you say to that? I find it absolutely incredible, considering most ADSL deals I checked out yesterday were between $109-199 and ALL had download limits. WANT, WANT, WANT. I MUST GET THIS.

Goodbye slow dialup.
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