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[13 March 2008|01:23 am] |
OK, some quick notes, since I've neglected this. Mum and Alan have been visiting since Monday, and it has been really lovely to see them. Especially Mum. She looks a bit healthier than I expected, actually, except for her arm that's shockingly bruised - her dehydration meant that when a nurse tried to draw blood, it was hard to find a vein and Mum's arm got seriously messed up. We've had a few nice days, just doing stuff around the city. Today - well, yesterday now - we went to the Melbourne Zoo. My tram route goes past it, so I've seen it very frequently for the year and a bit that I've lived here, but never actually gone in! I hadn't been to a zoo in years, and I must say, the blue penguins, meerkats, red pandas, and elephants are made of all kinds of SuperWin. I took a disturbingly large amount of photos, and I'll share some of the best ones in the coming days. Though I was a bit bothered by how some of the animals appeared a little bored, or that they needed larger enclosures.
In completely unrelated and I suppose somewhat weird-sounding news, I had an interesting experience on Tuesday. I was waiting outside uni on Swanston Street for Mum and Alan, just photographing trams. Now, it's no secret that I'm an albino - but I have never actually met another human albino. I've owned an albino cat and encountered plenty of other albino animals, but not another person. So there I am, excitedly photographing a tram of the Z1 class because I didn't previously have any photos of Z1s in my collection, when what do I see but this albino woman walk right past me. I had to look twice and I just about said something! Now, I think it's pretty sweet to be an albino, but I'm sure not everyone feels the same way, and I just don't like to bother people or intrude in the first place, so I didn't say anything. But wow. For 21 years, in my own little slice of existence, I've been the only one. Now I'm not. It's one thing to know as a sheer matter of fact that you're not the only one, but quite another thing entirely to actually encounter somebody else and see that fact manifested before your very eyes. And then just to cap off my day, one of only three Z2 trams still in operation rocked up and I went back into photography mode.
And since it's now very late and I need to be up in some seven hours, I shall end here and disappear for sleep. I hope you're all well. My apologies for being considerably absent lately. |
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| To hell with it all. |
[3 March 2008|01:42 am] |
What a year. I've just had enough. On Saturday, my mother had to go to hospital again. I didn't mention it in my last entry because I had very few details at hand. She feared she was suffering the onset of another attack of the pancreatitis, so she admitted herself to hospital and they monitored her condition. Much to my relief, it was not her pancreas playing up, but of course, it was something else, some issue relating to old internal scar tissue actually. The doctors have now let her return home as they believe the issue will work itself out, and if the pain reappears, they can treat it. That's more heartening than the whole pancreatitis matter, which can only be controlled rather than cured. Still, having to go to hospital again just makes me even more worried about my mother's health.
I suppose one positive is that one of the machines that Mum was plugged into kept being set off by how strong her heartbeat is. Apparently she has the heart of a super-fit person. I can't say I'm surprised. She used to do marathons and triathlons and all that sort of stuff when she was younger, and she still walks and cycles considerably. I'm sure she'd still at least be doing half-marathons if her health were better. So while her pancreas is stuffed, her heart is very strong.
It's just one of life's cruel jokes, isn't it? Here's a woman not even fifty who does all the right things, exercises frequently and eats well, ending up in hospital and having to implement all kinds of radical and undesirable diet changes to cater to some stupid condition she got anyway, while there's probably some 50+ year old wanker out there who smokes, gets sloshed nightly, eats abysmally, never exercises more than lifting the TV remote, and hasn't had a single health issue in their life. And here I am, down in Melbourne, unable to much beyond offer my concern and sympathy on the phone. I hate being so bloody far away. If I were in Brisbane, I could at least jump on a train down to the Gold Coast. I wouldn't trade living in Melbourne for anything, but it's times like these that I feel every second of the 18 hour drive between Melbourne and Queensland very acutely. What's next, you know?
If her health holds up, she's coming to Melbourne for a few days next week. I'm very happy about that. And then, of course, I'm going to Brisbane in late April to see Porcupine Tree with her. Speaking of Porcupine Tree, their new live release, We Lost The Skyline, is simply amazing. It's just over 30 minutes of only Steven Wilson and John Wesley performing a stripped-down set at a record store appearance. The songs are rearranged and sound fantastic. Drown With Me in particular has struck a chord with me; SW and Wes vocally interact in an eerily beautiful way during the "resting there in a stream/buried in green" portion. I would have loved to have heard them do the third part of Anesthetize too, but you can't have everything; all the tracks here are absolutely fantastic. I've played this a lot and it has brought me some measure of cheer this weekend. Immersing myself in music seems to be healthy. The cricket today was also very entertaining, with Sachin Tendulkar scoring a fantastic century to take India to victory over Australia. Small pleasures like that are important.
Small pleasures can only do so much, though. I'm exhausted. I'm sick of 2008 already. I've already had one bad year. I feel so much worry and concern, and I just hope there's no more because I couldn't take it. University starts tomorrow. Today, actually; it's early Monday already. Perhaps I can just immerse myself in my studies and lose myself inside my mind. I'll still worry though, no matter what I do. I'm so worn out. I'm sorry, I have e-mails and LJ comments to reply to, but I just am not up to it. I'm going to bed. Maybe I'll wake up to something better. |
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[8 February 2008|10:15 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | grandpa, mum | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | 'Lit By The Light Of Morning' by Sculptured | ] |
Things are looking up. My mother was allowed to go home from hospital today. She sounds very tired and exhausted, but at least she's on the mend and by all accounts received really good care. Whether she will remain healthy long term remains to be seen; it sounds like things are a bit unpredictable. However, she follows the doctors' instructions very closely, so hopefully she can avoid further issues.
My Grandpa's funeral was today. I really wish I could have been there. Strangely, nobody has contacted me at all. I sent my father a text message and I haven't heard back. I'm a bit worried how everybody is taking this, especially my grandmother. They were married nearly 53 years.
I don't really have much else to say today. Sri Lanka were absolutely embarrassing in the cricket. Their bowlers were competent, but almost the whole team totally and utterly failed with the bat. The high point was Muttiah Muralitharan of all people smashing Nathan Bracken for six straight down the park. Shame the game was over a ball later. Also, I am convinced that with every passing game, Bracken looks more and more like a girl I went to school with.
Have a good one, folks. |
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| Don't you just love life? |
[5 February 2008|10:06 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | cricket, grandpa, life, mum | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  worried | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | 'Hatesong' by Porcupine Tree | ] |
Dear life, the universe, and everything else,
Please, give me a bit of a break. I had quite enough on my plate with Grandpa's passing. It's the first time I've lost anybody close to me and I'm having a rough time of it, you know? I was starting to make progress, though. I was going to go out shopping, get back to my e-mails, and try to return to the swing of things. Then of course you just have to go and kick me when I'm down with my mother being admitted to hospital due to a recurrence of the pancreatitis that had her rushed to hospital the day I began my move to Melbourne last year. Thanks, life. Thanks a bloody lot. Sure, she's OK now, with good medical treatment and painkillers and all that good stuff, but I don't exactly like my mother ending up in Accident & Emergency and I sure as hell don't welcome the news that no matter how well she follows medical advice and is very careful with regards to her actions and diet, she is likely to suffer seemingly random pancreatic problems like this for the rest of her life. So now I'm both grieving and worried. Just what I wanted.
Well, at least the cricket's been good, albeit rain-affected. I'd never watched Lasith Malinga's bowling action before - he doesn't bowl overarm, he bowls roundarm, and it's quite an extraordinary thing to watch. It's like he doesn't have an elbow! I've tried to replicate it but it's not easy. And in other news, the Porcupine Tree tour anticipation has kept my spirits up a bit. I baked really delicious chocolate muffins at midnight last night - yes, that's my solution to being unable to sleep. Apparently I'm taking after my mother there. Now I suppose I'll go take after my father and pour a glass of wine, turn up the music, try not to get bogged down dwelling on negatives, and wish the cricket that was going so well earlier hadn't been washed out. Why the hell do they schedule day-nighters in Brisbane in summer anyway? What do you associate with summer evenings in Queensland? That's right, storms. They should at least have the common sense to schedule the matches at the start or finish of the season, i.e. spring and autumn, or figure out a way to put a roof on the 'Gabba and find the money to do it.
So yes, thanks life. This is precisely how I wanted my February to begin; trying to drown out reality by absorbing myself in cricket and music. Can't say the month looks like improving either. Thanks a bunch.
Cheers,
Ax |
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tired