So what happened to Axver? What happened to the guy who lives in a balance of contradictions, a world where blood sometimes runs thin in the family, and where the vast majority of people are morons? Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere. Rather, I have discovered a glimmer of hope and a sense of optimism. I am a happier, more joyful person now, and I have been smiling all day.
This isn't some flaky optimism by any stretch of the imagination. This is profound. I have realised something deep inside myself and a void that has been present for a long time has now been filled. Truly, the discovery of joy is a wonderful thing. Honestly, I don't think I know what words to use to describe it. I'm not quite sure if many of you will really notice a great change as I kept my greatest negativity to a close circle of friends or wholly to myself, but I can feel my outlook beginning to change. I feel as if I am actually ready for the future now. I'm still terrified, but I am ready to face it and I know I'll make it. Now there's some optimism you would not have heard from me at this time last week.
I bet a lot of you are wondering what in particular prompted this. Let me just say that a number of conversations over the last few days, including one on the phone, have brought me something much more than happiness and that has had a snowball effect that has impacted upon other facets of my life.
I am going to close this entry with a quote. Enjoy. It's John 15:9-12.
As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
You also might want to go listen to Gloria. The 21 November 1984 performance from Dortmund is a particularly outstanding one. Gloria, in te domine, gloria, exultate!
By the way, I posted some U2 trivia a long time ago and no-one ever managed to answer it. Here it is again, with a hint.
Many people have noted Bono's incorrect count-in at the start of Vertigo (1, 2, 3, 14), but it is not the first time Bono has counted in incorrectly. When was the first time? Hint: 1983. That hint has nothing to do with 40, Two Hearts Beat As One, or any other studio performances on the War album. In fact, if anyone actually manages to answer this trivia, it is a clear indication that they are a U2 completist and have a remarkably good memory.
(Also, if you are thinking of any interesting counting during the second-ever performance of Mothers Of The Disappeared on 25 April 1987, that's not a count-in and thus not the correct answer. None of Bono's counting during live performances of Bullet The Blue Sky counts. [i.e. "This guy comes up to me [...], peeling off those dollar bills, slapping them down. [...] One hundred! Two hundred! Three hundred! Four!" - 27 November 1993. Sorry, not applicable.])